Royal Flush

So yesterday I wrote about my wonderful "productive" experience. All day after that, I felt like something wasn't right. About 8pm last night, when I tried to have some water and it came right back up, I realized I was stuck.
That's a downright freaky ass feeling, I'm telling you. Like 1, 2 Freddy's coming for you freaky. Like the Halloween theme song all of a sudden playing out of no where freaky.

I started to panic, so naturally, I turned to the interwebs to fix things. The interwebs know everything.

There were many suggestions out there: papaya enzymes, pineapple juice etc...however, the suggestion that I found that I actually had in my house was lemon juice, gulping very hot water, and downward facing dog. 

Now look. I'm not condoning this for people who want to eat too much consistantly and then abuse their band. BUT. If you have an "accident" like I did and get something stuck, the above was like a miracle cure.
I had about 3 swigs of lemon juice, half a cup of hot lemon tea, and then went in the bathroom and did downward facing dog yoga pose and it almost immediately all came up, along with the chicken sausage that was stuck.

It was a miracle. I was in the bathroom yelling HALLELUJAH and Nils thought I was on crack.
But it worked. That's all that matters. And I learned my lesson. I don't ever want that feeling again. 

Stagnant

Not moving. Still. Hasn't budged. The same. Motionless. Immobile.
That would be the scale. I'm stuck at 244. So...here's the thing...remember that last post where I was all "Everytime I worked out in the past I stopped losing weight"? Um. Oh hey there scale. How come you aren't moving?

Ok, so in reality, this has happened a couple times. I've lost a big chunk and then I've seen the scale hold for a little while. Which is normal. I know my body is taking time to catch up to what's going on.

But I can't help but go into full on panic mode. Like there's a fire and my dog is stuck under the bed. Or I went on a shopping spree and spent all my money and now I can't pay my rent. Or, wait...do I want two pink lines or one???? TWO OR ONE DAMMIT!!!!!!!!!!

I thought it would calm my fears to go to the gym tonight but then I forgot my shoes at home. I suppose I can't go work on the elliptical in my leopard print heels, hey?